ok so i'm in a sucky mood.... I have had all i can stand and cant stand no more....I want to feel loved and cared for the way a woman should..I am tired of feeling neglected...both emotionally and physically...

Tonight I had already felt stressed by the move, and the kids ronnie, just had to start bitchin as always...insult after insult...bitching and more bitchin...I finially flipped on him... he was up in my face screaming and i warned him to back off he didnt i spit aiming right between his eyes and when he returned the jester I just started swinging wildly...I do not know how many times I hit him or even where all I know is I clocked...

I have been building up anger for quite some time...I finially released just a little.......

i realized what i was doing and stopped...but not b4...

Am I sorry, NO I can't say that I am....do I wanna do it again yes I do and worse... I just wanna inflict something severe on him...u know pain that he can feel, the way I feel when he neglects my needs and shatters my self esteam to hell...is this wrong...probably but I can not help how I feel...

he had the nerve last night to tell me iffin we stick together we moght even fall in love...HELLO... I fell in love spent almost 3 yrs trying to show i'm worthy of his and still never hear an I love u... I am starting to fall out of love and seriously desiring a new mate..one that will hold me. love me, carress me, and show me what a woman needs....and do all this because he wants to....

ok enough dumping...

we r finially moved into our new house... my room is the best looking here...stars and the babys stuff is all over the living room...the kitchen isnt ready yet and the dining room still has boxes in it... I so wanted to get the livin room cleared today...but of course the events i just described changes the mood...

ok here I go trying to go back to that topic....so I'm going...bye bye

JESILYN

You can read older entries by visiting the achieves on the right. Thank You For Visiting!