last night was a doozie...

I was up til 3am online w/ my friend... she needs so much support I am so warn out but feel so obligated to b there 4 her. Im in the proscess of convencing her that something that happen last year wasnt her fault..... I feel bad she keeps appologizing to me. she dont need to do that it wasnt her fault but she cant seem to understand that. I know her emotions r real and I respect that but I dont feel she needs to do that. I don't blame her at all 4 what she went thru....

I found out she is dabbeling in drugs, alcohol and smoking cigs... I wish I knew how to stop her... I hav told her all the medical reasons why she shouldnt I hav told her the financial reasons why she shouldnt... and yet I fear I didnt get thru.. I care about her well being...

not like I can run to her parents she would get into so much trouble and the trust she has in me will be gone. I dont believe it would help anyway. they would isolate her then she would probably get these things at school... yes I know it sounds like an excuse but I just dont know what else I can do.

I talk to one person in her family but I think her hands r tied too knowing how hard the parents would come down on her... and then theres the lack of communication problem...

Im watching my back and trying to stay almost professional w/ her but I understand how these things happen and I feel her pain sometimes its over whelming.

atleast she got protection 4 when she is expermenting w/ sexual activities w/ her b/f. I was so worried but her aunt did the right thing and took her to the clinic. protection is better than none... though I wish she would let her body grow up 1st... she has been thru so much she thinks she is only good 4 sex.. no young lady should feel that way. I told her she is so much more valuable that she is a person and deserves better.

she has so much to learn and a hard road ahead. I hope one day she looks back and knows I ment well..and tried to help.

being a teen ager is hard enough w/ out all this other shit...

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